Bookmark #822

I have barely thought about leaving this city, and the bells of opportunity have started to ring all around me. An email there, a phone call here, and so much to do. In mathematical terms, you would call the length of my stay here and my success an inversely proportional relationship. In simple chemical terms, you would classify this city as an inhibitor in the otherwise spontaneous reaction of my life. In the realm of physics, you would look to the coefficient of friction to explain the lack of activity. I may add that the idea is now colloquial anyway. We owe it to the gurus who peddle and pander the ideas of self-improvement as if it were not a deeply personal concept or a compound word, the first part of which told you clearly what it was supposed to be about. Coming back to my predicament: In computer science, I reckon you would call it the jargon-esque concept of What You See Is What You Get. And when I get comfortable in this life, I see little else, and so, I get little, too. This city traps you between the hills around it; its lush, natural boundary blocks all you can see. It is where all potential goes to rest. Ha! That is another term for you. I reckon physics is the most colloquial of the bunch.

(Of course, this is but preparation. Before we pack our bags, we must bolster our minds. Change is change, after all. It is impossible to exist in two places simultaneously, so we must choose and tell ourselves a story. To sit in one place forever, however, would also be a death, just a different, albeit understated one. For now, this is the story, and it serves its purpose. This city stops me from growing. The roots are curled too far beneath the ground. I could not pull them out even if I tried. So, I must leave with what I can carry and then come back once again when I am homesick. I reckon this is how it is with people like me, those with a place to call home but who do not quite feel at home there. We are fated to repeat an endless cycle of slash and burn. If this were a lesson in chemistry, they would claim my life was in a state of equilibrium. I do not know; I rarely feel as balanced. But I reckon that would be physics.)