Bookmark #480

For all my little words, I was so easily misunderstood that one might even pity me, but then, we do not strive to be understood; we strive to be honest. That is what it means to have control over your words. That is how all writers live; that is how all people ought to live. Honesty is a trait one must practice daily, which proves to be quite an irksome quirk in a deceitful world where smiles win over truth. And so, they call us meddling and bothersome and annoying. All writers are aggravating instigators of arguments and heated battles simply because it is not in them to lie, and if they must lie, the lie must not be a grave one. I struggled with this same disease, and the more I came into my own, the more the symptoms increased. I found it utterly hard to resist not saying what I thought. Of course, this did not bode well, for even the oldest friend can turn into an enemy at a sour word or two, albeit how honest said word is, especially over how honest the word tends to be.

There is a calling, somewhere in my head, ringing, reverberating, saying just one thing and one thing only: give me the truth, give me nothing but the truth. This voice is behind all the revolutions throughout history, and it is also behind every schism that has no stake in the fate of the world, but no one can know this before it happens and before time unfolds. The only thing we must do in that case is to exercise its will and keep on telling the truth. If you, too, understand this predicament and find it much too hard to smile with bleached teeth, shining with nothing but well-polished lies like they do, I want you to know there will be others. You will find them.

For all the times you have to smile to maintain decorum, I promise you, there will be others who will welcome all you have to say, and they will hold every honest word you have in you in the highest of regards. And what if you spend your life believing this, and then there are none? Then, know that you will still have accomplished something most cannot begin to fathom. You will not have lied.

// if you want to support this walk to nowhere, you can pitch in here