On my walk today, I asked myself, almost spontaneously, did I get this life because I am the way I am or am I who I am because of this life? Of course, like all great questions, I did not have an answer to it. Not right now, no. Questions that are truly worth asking do not have their answers readily available. It does not mean they should not be asked. Quite the contrary, they should be asked, and then, they should be given the space to blossom into some sort of response, like the flowers of spring blossom in their due time.
I dreamt of a wishing well the other day—made from the cleanest work of masonry I have ever seen. I do not know the park in the dream, but I do know the place which should have been there instead of the park. Waiting for my turn, I sat on the steps of a gazebo nearby and finally got up to walk up to the well when I saw a window. Facing the well, I put my hands in my pockets, and they were full of pennies or whatever coin they were. It was a dream, and I did not inspect them, and even if I had, I do not recall. The memory would have fallen between the gaps between sleep and wakefulness. But there was a problem. As much as I had all the pennies I could have ever needed, I did not have wishes.
I tried to think of one, but after wasting a good few minutes in front of the well, I walked away deeper into the garden on a walk to nowhere. I do not remember much about that dream from that point on, which is natural, and I am not one for the hullabaloo of the meanings of our dreams. Some mystic tells people what they want to hear in exchange for some money. That is all there is to it. I am not a man who thinks in superstitions.
I only found it curious, almost ridiculous. That is how most things are in life: curiosities.
What anything means, what the answer is to something, I wish I knew. All I know is it was one of the most comical situations I have ever found myself in, and my only regret is that it was in a dream. In reality, for every penny I do have, I have a thousand wishes, maybe more.
Probably, a thousand more.